Mystical Connections: Codependency, Mysticism, and the Sacral Chakra

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Hello, welcome to Practically Magick.

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This is your host, Courtney Pearl.

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I am a pagan folk witch, card reader, healer, spiritualist, Celtic priestess, teacher, artist, and mystic seeker.

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I am discovering the true Magick of the world and I would like to share it with you.

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So let's get to it.

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into it.

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Today's episode, we are talking about codependency.

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I hope you listened to last week's episodes.

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Um, the last couple episodes have been amazing.

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I particularly loved doing the burning witches episode that was just released when I am recording this now.

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Um, and just a lot of exciting, fun things.

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Going on with the podcast lately.

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I'm just having a very crazy busy week.

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I wonder how you are doing.

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I am going to start by pulling a card and actually I am going to go back to the Gaia Oracle deck.

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We use this, uh, for pulling a card at the beginning of the episode in a, a few episodes ago.

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Um, and I haven't used it in a while.

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So I thought it might be fun to pull that out again as we're kind of coming into summertime.

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It just feels like the right time to be honoring Gaia and the Mother Earth and all of the, all the blooming and life that is happening.

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You hear me shuffling? I am pulling a card for this episode.

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We are specifically going to be talking a lot about relationships.

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We're going to be talking about codependency.

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We're going to be talking about the sacral chakra.

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And you're probably wondering, isn't that all a little bit psychology rather than the mystical? And I would dare say to anyone If you don't think that the sciences, um, and the mysteries of the world are not related to Magick, even as we are connecting things like biology, human nature, um, neurology, the brain, all of it is connected.

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I don't think one exists without being connected in the universe to all of the other things.

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And it's a scientist's job to really kind of, Um, be rigid about the scientific method and make sure that any theories are tested and retested and proven before something can be moved out of the theory phase and into fact.

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I don't think that even with that process needing to happen for the science community, I think that's a very important thing to understand is that something needs to be proven, but I don't think that disproves or discounts, um, that a collective, there are a lot of things that the consciousness, the collective consciousness understands and feels when a lot of people feel the same things.

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So I do believe they're all connected to, uh, to make that point.

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I've been shuffling as I've been talking.

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So here is.

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Oh my gosh, I cannot make this stuff up.

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I pulled this card.

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Right here, live as you're listening, no rehearsal.

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In fact, my episode today is unscripted, so if it seems like I am just all over the place, that may be why.

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But I think I've done this enough times, I feel like I can kind of comfortably move through this topic.

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It's a topic I know pretty well.

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And I have just pulled a card from the deck called Sacred Earth Mother.

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Sacred Earth Mother And it says underneath that a message of love.

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And it actually has a picture of a heart.

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And it looks like three little bubbles are coming out of the heart.

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It's a shining heart, rays of sunshine all around it.

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It almost looks as though very blurry in the background.

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And this is just my interpretation of it.

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It looks like hands are reaching up towards the heart, but you can barely see them because they're just blinded by the light that the heart is emanating, has emanating from it.

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And it's so fascinating that today we're going to be talking about relationships.

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We're talking about codependency patterns, and this is the card that I get.

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So I feel like that is just confirmation and validation for, um, for us today that our topic is really going to be centered around predominantly romantic relationships.

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But I think that a lot of times when we talk about relationships, we can see overlap in relationships that we have with Anyone who is close to us, the relationships we have with our spouse or our partner might also reflect relationships we have with our parents, the way they have relationships with each other, the way that we have relationships with our children.

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I think that they're Like anything else, it's all connected.

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So I don't think you can discount any of that.

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So if you're not particularly in a romantic relationship right now, don't turn off the episode just yet.

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There's a lot to discuss.

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And I'm excited because this topic is actually going to be a two part episode.

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We're going to have a little bit of background information today on codependency, what it is, how to look for it, what are some healing factors, what are some things to understand.

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Um, and as always, On my blog, my website, I am going to post references, information, additional reading resources, things that if you listen to this episode and you're like, that is really something I need to double down on and get some more, more for that, then there is going to be some additional information for you.

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So don't miss that.

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But I want to start off today with a little story time.

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Uh, and instead of using a folk story, I'm going to, I kind of use a personal experience.

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Um, when I first started at the Institute of Healing Arts, it was coming out of a time for me that I was very aware of my codependency patterns.

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Um, my husband having struggled, struggled with addiction and.

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You know, kind of letting that be the catapult that allowed us to really look at our relationship and myself and the part that I played in that relationship, um, even in attending those, um, Al Anon meetings where it was like, um, family members of people who struggle with addiction can have a support group.

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Um, and I only attended a few times, and it was during COVID, so I couldn't, um, go as much as I would like, but I think it was really helpful to be able to read some of the materials that they had to offer and to be able to kind of come to some awareness about how do I play a part.

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In this interaction between me and my spouse, and how has that played a part in a lot of other relationships that I have in my life? Um, so I'm gonna kind of try to outline for you this scenario that helped me.

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really grasp this idea of what codependency actually is.

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So I want you to imagine two people, person number one and person number two.

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And person number one, um, has a pillow.

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in her hand and she's tossing it to person number two and person number two tosses it back and person number one tosses it back to person number two and it becomes this little game and because person number two doesn't really know what else to do because it seems like we're playing this little game here she just continues to toss it back and and person number one loves this so they just keep going and after a while it becomes apparent that Person number one is really enjoying this interaction and keeps tossing the pillow over, but person number two might be becoming aware that she doesn't have to play this game if she doesn't want to and that she really maybe doesn't have to keep tossing this pillow back and forth.

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And The pillow in this scenario is going to represent person number one's stuff.

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And I use that word stuff, like it's our stuff.

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It's our, our beliefs, our patterns, our, um, You know, um, these sort of heavier emotions and beliefs that we carry with us, um, it's all of our shadow work.

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It's all of our work of going within and looking at self sabotaging types of, you know, Patterns that we have, and thinking, and feeling, and instead of really taking a moment to look at it, person number one has decided it's much more fun to pass it to person number two, and person number two just keeps passing it back and forth, and And that's great because as long as they're playing this game, person number one does not have to actually look at her stuff.

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She doesn't have to heal anything.

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She doesn't have to be self aware.

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She just kind of gets to keep playing this game with person number two.

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And as I said, person number two might start to feel like, I don't really want to do this anymore.

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And I don't really want to play this game.

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I kind of have my own stuff to deal with.

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And I'm so busy playing this game with person number one.

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Um, I really can't take the time that I need to do to look at my self sabotaging behaviors and look at my, um, my work, my personal inner work that I need to do.

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So.

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Eventually, person number two realizes, I don't have to do this.

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So they might drop the pillow right at their own feet, right? They go bloop and it drops at their feet.

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Now person number one notices, oh, person number two is not playing the game anymore, but they are also not tossing that back to me.

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That pillow is at their own feet right now in their space.

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So I don't actually have to deal with my stuff.

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this way either.

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Um, I get to kind of just leave it there.

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And once person number two realizes that, she might toss that pillow right back, but to the other person, person number one's feet, so that it lands right in her space.

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Now that's great.

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Okay.

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That means that now person number two has finally decided it's not my responsibility.

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It's not my burden.

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This is not my stuff.

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I now recognize that this pillow that we've been playing with, I might have confused it for my stuff.

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I might have thought I had to keep doing this, but finally reached a point where I don't want to carry this anymore and I'm going to leave it with you.

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And I will no longer be playing this game.

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And that's great for person number two.

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Now, person number two has the freedom and unburdened space to be able to look at her own pillow or her own stuff and say, now, what do I want to work on? What is.

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important for me to make my life better, to feel more authentic, more aligned with my true self, all the kind of work that I do in my prism healing, when I help people do emotional processing, for example.

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So person number two feels great about this.

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And This helps us define codependency, which in the case of the person number 2 tossing the pillow back and forth or keeping the pillow in her space, that would be dishonoring her.

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To honor person number one.

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So if at any time you feel like I'm dishonoring me to honor someone else, that is codependency.

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Now, what if that pillow is in person number one space now, but person number one still isn't ready to pick it up and deal with it.

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Let's just imagine that person number one is kind of heavy in their addictions, or they're just really in avoidance patterns, or they're just not ready to look at their stuff, pick up their pillow, and deal with it.

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Now let's imagine that person number two has finally gotten free of person number one's stuff.

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She's let that go.

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But she's getting kind of bothered and annoyed that person number one will not pick up her pillow.

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So she starts to berate her, nag her, um, punish her, whatever, you know, even get angry and yell at her.

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Starts to go into patterns of dishonoring person number one to honor herself.

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And this is the flip side of codependency.

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So this is when The person is finally decided to unburden themselves of the other person's stuff, um, not take responsibility for it, even if that makes person number one angry, even if it makes them feel betrayed or, um, you know, they might have a lot of feelings about it because they have been really, really satisfied with engaging in this game of toss and having the pillow be not dealt with.

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But now person number two.

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is engaging in dishonoring person number one to honor themselves.

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They're not going to let person number one simply handle their pillow, their stuff, in their own time.

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And that is, again, just another variation of codependency.

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So, This scenario was very helpful to me when first starting to heal and understand and witness my own patterns in my life because a big source of my own healing and a, a large motivating factor to everything that I.

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tend to do is control.

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It's something that is a common constant theme that I have is I always feel kind of like in order for me to achieve safety, feelings of safety and security, I want to make sure I'm in control of myself and the people I love.

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And when doing emotional processing when I was going through the school, I actually was able to link that back to a very specific time in my life.

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I had a very specific, um, IPT session, emotional process session where I was taken back to age 9.

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And there was a particular family member, um, I'll try not to be specific because they may not want their story told, but there was a family member who was older, um, who was a grownup and I was only nine.

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And this person was going through a divorce that was particularly painful and a little bit traumatic.

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And they had young children and, um, it just so happened that my family was close enough to be able to go and, uh, help them.

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You know, kind of move out of their house or like box things up for them when their spouse had left with their children.

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So it was a very, very emotional time.

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It was sad for everyone.

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And I was old enough to just kind of be there to witness that and to be in the sadness.

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And there was a part of me that just said, okay, This can never happen to me.

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I will never let this happen to me.

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I will control my people, my family, my, my situation so that this never happens to us.

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When I'm married someday, I will just make sure that this never happens to us because, you know, obviously it's too sad.

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It's very, it's, it's heartbreaking.

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So in order to protect myself from that kind of uncertainty, something like that happening to me, I will just.

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Not let it happen to me.

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Um, and that's a very reasonable kind of thinking for a nine year old to have, you know, to be able to come to some kind of conclusion that would make me feel powerful and make me feel like I could actually make it.

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Control that.

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But in my more recent journey of healing and being aware of that pattern, I'm able to understand it in a different and new way, a way that I didn't, I couldn't see at the time because when I was going through some of my own sad and painful, um, moments of my marriage and my life, I was able to actually be kind of slapped in the face with the idea that, Hey, You tried really, really, really, really hard to control your people, and it didn't work anyway.

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Actually, what it did is it kind of pushed people away.

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It disconnected from other people.

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Instead of being loving and closer, your desire to control everything actually made it worse.

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And I truly believe that, um, You know, when a, when a spouse is going through something and that may be addiction, that may be something else, it may be whatever.

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they're going through.

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It is their battle to fight and it is their choice of when and how to move into a healing space or how to, you know, begin recovery or even to just come into a space where they can be aware of healing.

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what they need to do.

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It is on them.

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And I truly believe that.

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I don't think there's anything, anything that I could have done differently that would have, you know, fixed things or made things better.

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But it was incredibly helpful to go through that experience and then say, what part did I play and what do I have control over healing? And changing and making better choices and making thing, making choices that will ultimately be better at connecting us instead of pushing each other apart.

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So I think that the story with the pillow was an extremely powerful imagery for me.

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Um, I actually got to see it played out because the instructor at the Institute of Healing Arts, she does a great job of standing up and showing this with a, she'll have a volunteer come up and say, can I toss this pillow to you? And they'll toss it back and forth.

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And when it's done right in front of you, I think it's a little bit more effective, but I think in this situation, because I'm able to explain it to you in this way, hopefully you're able to see what I could see out of that and say, now, how do I make sure that as I move through healing codependency patterns, I can actually learn how to honor myself? Honor my path, honor where I'm at, witness the things I need to witness about myself, and then honor other people in their path.

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And here's the tricky part, and I want you to pay very close attention to how you feel when I say these words, because almost everybody that I have ever said them to, um, including my own self, has had a reaction.

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Um, what if it were actually possible for you to be okay, no matter what anyone else in your circle or family or community is going through? What if that were possible? And I want you to just sit with that for a second because I have a lot of, particularly mothers.

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You know, it does fall on women, I think, because culturally and.

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Just the way our society is set up, women hold a lot of the emotional burden of the family union, of the, of the community.

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I mean, your church congregation, whatever it is, women tend to hold it and men tend to dump it on the women.

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That's a generalization, of course, but I mean, you can try to fight me on that.

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Um, anyway, the point is a lot of times women, mothers will listen to that phrase and they will say, if my child is suffering in some way, I'm not okay.

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How can I possibly be okay? If my child is suffering.

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No, I totally understand that because I struggled with that too.

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In our healing journey, in our ability to go through life, and this is kind of um, it's kind of borrowing a little bit of Buddhist concepts, um, how much of our suffering is suffering because we had something happen to us or someone we love and it was unexpected and we couldn't have prevented it if we tried and it's just like we were in an accident or we had something happen and it's painful and there's suffering involved in that.

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And a percentage of our suffering is those circumstances where we just could not have foreseen it, we couldn't have prevented it, and it just happened to us.

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And then there's the additional suffering that we put ourselves through because our brain is lying to us and telling us that if we suffer, if we worry, if we take on the burden of suffering, We will somehow improve the situation.

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Somehow.

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And I say the big lie because that is literally a lie.

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I mean, it's something that our bodies and our brains are conditioned to do, kind of evolutionarily, and a lot of other reasons why.

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And I can go into the neuro research of that a little bit, but Basically, our brain is telling us that if we think we might be in danger or if our children or spouse are in danger in some way, we will somehow get out of danger better if we stress and we go into fight, flight, or freeze, right? And the truth is, we will actually be able to come up with a lot more creative solutions and we will be able to navigate our way through it if we are calm.

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Rest and digest.

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Engage your parasynthetic autonomic nervous system.

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So just to give you kind of a little, little, a little tiny peek into what this is like.

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When your brain is in fight, flight, or freeze, you can only process data at 40 bits per second.

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That's not very fast and that's not very productive.

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So say you're stressing out about something, you're worrying, you can't stop thinking about it.

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It's, it's your, your stress hormones are heightened.

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Your, your body is reacting with the stress of it all.

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And your brain is like, what are we doing? That's not helpful.

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But if you are able to flip the switch into calm, if you are able to remind yourself in somehow, some way that you are not in danger, you are able to engage your parasynthetic autonomic nervous system and get into a rest and digest state, your brain will operate at 40, 000 bits per second.

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Let's just compare 40 bits per second stressed 40, 000 bits per second.

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Now your brain is like, okay, I've got this.

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So here's a solution right here or maybe we could do it this way or this might work or how about this? And now you've got several creative solutions to the problem that you can choose from.

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Okay.

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Now in a rest and digest state, that is the best state of mind to be able to calmly, calmly.

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Ask yourself the question, is this even mine? I'm stressing so much about something.

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Is this Even my stuff or my pillow.

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I'm using quotation marks in case you can't see.

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My pillow is my pillow.

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Is this my pillow to deal with? Or is it something I'm tossing back and forth in a codependency pattern with someone else? Am I taking their stuff? And if I take their stuff and I deal with it and I help them deal with it, am I giving them the message that they're not strong enough to deal with it themselves? Unwittingly, unknowingly, am I subconsciously giving them the message that, you know what, you're not strong enough to handle this.

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I'll handle it for you.

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And therefore stunting anyone's growth and stunting anyone's ability to actually take their first steps on the journey of their healing.

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So in a rest and digest state, we are able to calmly ask ourselves the question, is this my stuff? Do I actually need to handle this myself or do I need to just let the pillow go to the person? And give them lots of love and encouragement in being able to handle this situation.

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I am so sorry this is happening to you.

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I'm here for you if you need someone to talk to.

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Or, um, let's say your child is failing a class.

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And you would really like to step in and just kind of push them along to get the class passing to help them to do whatever it takes.

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What if instead you said something like, Oh, I'm so sorry.

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That's really tough.

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Um, what are you going to do? What are you going to do about that? And put the pillow back on them.

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Now, if you're in a pattern of codependency for a long time, or that's already kind of the pattern you're in, be prepared when you start holding boundaries on what you're going to take on and what you're not going to take on.

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Be prepared for some resistance because if a spouse or child or parent is really used to you picking up their pillow and dealing with it, they might feel betrayed.

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They might feel like You don't love them anymore.

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There might be some, you know, resentment about that.

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There might be some feelings.

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That doesn't mean that you're doing the wrong thing.

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In fact, we were told a lot of times when dealing with, um, a spouse that is struggling with addiction or a child that's struggling with addiction, anything like that, if they're not mad at you at some point, then you might not be doing the right things.

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You might be engaging in codependency patterns because they are going to get mad at you when you are no longer going to hold their stuff for them.

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It's reasonable.

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It's a reasonable reason to be mad because that's not what they're used to.

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So I am going to give you just a heads up, a warning.

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There's gonna be some tough trial and error with that, and there may be times when you feel like, oh no, I've boundaried up too much.

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Um, and there needs to be some practice at what is a boundary and what is not.

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How do I hold those boundaries? And I am going to say, because I said I would talk about the chakras, all of this codependency patterns and relationship things that we're talking about are very connected to the sacral chakra.

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So the sacral chakra is the reproductive organs.

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It's the area located under the belly button.

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It would be the womb if you're a woman.

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Um, it, it actually works perfectly with the, you're a woman, man, male, female.

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Non binary, it doesn't matter because that area of the body is the wheel of energy that operates with the creative center.

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So just like a baby gestates in the womb, this is your creative center.

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This is the area in which you use that energy, you use that power.

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to create, to put into the world, whatever it is that you are manifesting.

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It is connected to issues with money.

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Um, and it is connected to, uh, this topic today that we're talking about, codependency and relationships.

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It has to do with sexual pleasure and the idea that you are deserving of that pleasure.

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And it can be pleasure in a sense that is.

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Specifically sexual, but it also can have to do with pleasure.

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in general, that you deserve to have pleasure, that you deserve to have a relationship and to have experiences in life that bring you joy and bring you pleasure.

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And that's all part of the sacral chakra.

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And the sacral is, um, associated with the color orange.

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Stones that are often used for healing in that space is the carnelian.

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Um, really anything orange is going to be connected to that space.

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And A lot of times when I muscle testing different crystals that a client might need to help support them during a particular time or for particular issues, then, um, if it is patterns of codependency and things like that, that come up, that is what will typically, uh, come up for the crystal that they need.

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So, um, When I'm doing an emotional process with a client and I'm doing an IPT session, sometimes patterns will show up in relationships with parents.

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And I remember very vividly, one of the, uh, one of the students who started at the Institute of Healing Arts after I was shortly after, um, before I left.

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So I was in my level three, I was in my clinicals, I was getting ready to graduate, and she had just come in as a level one, and she was just learning these concepts, just starting out on the classes and courses and stuff, and there is a whole course.

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Um, actually I think it's two weeks that we spend learning about codependency, but she, she was asking questions about her relationship with her mother.

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And she was like, I, I really want my mom to learn this.

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And I want my mom to heal.

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And I want my mom to experience deep healing.

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And I know how much she needs it.

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And She said, I don't know how to let go of that.

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I don't know how to detach myself from that feeling of, I want my mom to heal.

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I want my mom to find peace.

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And I could see it in her face.

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I could see it in her eyes.

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This was something new and a concept she just could not grasp yet, but that's because she was so new in her healing journey.

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The more she worked on herself, I knew that eventually she would go, Oh, Oh, it's my job to heal me.

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And by ripple effect, it will have an effect on my mom.

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But that's not actually my concern that I can have love for my mom.

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I can support my mom.

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I can tell my mom, you know, I'm here for her in whatever ways that I feel comfortable with, but it's not my job to.

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heal my mom.

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It's not my job to be in that space.

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And I knew that would take time.

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I know that for people just starting out and just learning about these things, it's a very difficult concept to grasp.

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And every single person listening right now and every single person not listening right now has issues with codependency because it's a part of our human nature.

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It's a part of us to try to navigate that balance between how do I show up.

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In love for someone with, while also holding boundaries and saying, I'm not going to hold herself.

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Right.

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I will say as a personal, personal note in my journey is that when I stopped focusing on everyone else, when I turned my attention to myself and I literally had to visualize it as if I was running a race on a racetrack and there was the lines on the ground.

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And like, my husband was running his part of the track in his lane, and I'm running mine in my lane, and it actually doesn't matter at all who finishes first, where we're at on the track, because we're not racing.

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All we're doing is running our own race.

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And when I could visualize that, I was like, It was literally a message like, stay in your lane, Courtney.

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That was the thing I kept hearing over and over again.

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Stay in your own lane, Courtney.

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His lane and his race are not your concern.

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That's up to him.

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You can cheer for him.

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You can encourage him.

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You can express love for him, but it's not up to you to fix his life or situation or anything else.

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And, uh, I can tell you I'm never going to be perfectly healed in this area.

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It is something that I struggle with daily, but I struggle far less than I used to.

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I mean, it is like night and day difference.

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If you compare it to who I was just a few years ago, my own ability to just say, I am working on me.

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And I'm going to just hope that that makes a difference because the truth is working on yourself, your inner self, your own self can not, not have an impact on other people around you.

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Did that double negative make any sense? Um, it's impossible basically for you to do focus completely on yourself and do your own healing work and have it not affect the people around you who love you and you love them, but that shouldn't be the focus.

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I witnessed my entire family raise their vibrational frequency and become much more healed and aware and authentic and enlightened people as I began to just focus on myself.

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And I do have people, friends and people I love who, uh, who like to come up to me and say, Hey, Oh my gosh, my husband or brother or dad or mom would love, I would love for them to do an emotional process with you.

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An emotional process would just be amazing for them.

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I'm going to see if I can get them to schedule with you, or I'm going to schedule them with you.

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And it almost always never works that way.

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Most of the time I say, how about you think about scheduling for yourself? Schedule an emotional process and see how you feel.

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And if they're ready to do it, they'll schedule when they're ready.

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If it's something that they really, really want to do, they want to start working on their stuff.

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If they want to pick up their pillow, they will.

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But that's my advice to anyone who comes to me with those.

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Those words.

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I say schedule for you.

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Okay.

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I do have a question from a listener today.

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I had, uh, someone reach out to me and ask me, do I do clearing or cleansing for spaces? I have a particular person who was came to me and said, um, I'm just been like in a string of bad relationships.

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I've got these patterns that I can't seem to let go of, um, and she wanted maybe possibly to do a Reiki session, um, which yes, I would totally highly recommend.

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Um, an emotional process session would be excellent for breaking patterns and Figuring out what it is about you, your own self, who maybe attract those relationships or keep getting involved in those same types of relationships.

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But she did say, I have, I just feel like the energy in my home has been negative or just heavy or, um, you know, something about it is off.

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And, uh, I said, I absolutely can do that.

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Um, and yes, it is part Reiki.

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Uh, I don't do anything, whether it's witchcraft or ceremony or ritual or anything else that I do.

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Reiki is part of my practice no matter what I'm doing.

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So, um, I can cleanse spaces with Reiki.

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Um, And I always use my drum for this because drumming a space is kind of like, um, a perfect way to cleanse a space, but also bless a space.

300
00:41:09,493.4841129 --> 00:41:15,593.4831129
And I have a particularly special drum that I use because this drum has been everywhere and does everything with me.

301
00:41:15,943.4831129 --> 00:41:19,983.4841129
I use it for all my Reiki sessions and drama chakra drumming sessions.

302
00:41:20,673.4841129 --> 00:41:23,743.4841129
Um, but I also, and I took it with me to England.

303
00:41:23,843.4841129 --> 00:41:28,253.4831129
This is the same drum that you see in my videos where I'm drumming in Stonehenge.

304
00:41:29,98.4841129 --> 00:41:32,613.4841129
Um, so it's I like to say it's been blessed by the stones.

305
00:41:33,243.4841129 --> 00:41:47,383.4841129
But when I first got this drum, I actually did a guided meditation where, um, we were asked to go meet the spirit of our drum so that we could become acquainted with that spirit, that spirit guide.

306
00:41:47,863.4831129 --> 00:41:56,383.4841129
And anytime we're using our drum, we call this particular spirit to be present, to be with us, to, as we're drumming.

307
00:41:57,133.4841129 --> 00:41:59,873.4841129
And so my drum is the Kaliak.

308
00:42:00,288.4841129 --> 00:42:01,618.4841129
She's the Crone.

309
00:42:02,128.4841129 --> 00:42:11,8.4841129
She's an energy of, um, to me, I saw images of women I have known in my life, all of them older than me.

310
00:42:11,868.4841129 --> 00:42:34,728.4831129
Um, and not necessarily that they were all old like the Crone, but the Crone energy To me, when I saw those women, people I knew in life, people that I knew from archetypes, uh, or deities that I had learned about, they are the loving grandmotherly type of energy.

311
00:42:35,428.4841129 --> 00:42:38,428.4841129
And so that is the spirit of my drum.

312
00:42:38,438.4841129 --> 00:42:42,883.4841129
When I call that spirit to come and drum.

313
00:42:43,453.4841129 --> 00:42:46,193.4841129
Drumming is a fantastic way to cleanse the space.

314
00:42:47,163.4841129 --> 00:42:56,963.4831129
And just really quickly, because I want to do more, uh, talk about this more in other episodes when we talk more about witchcraft and actual craft of the witchcraft.

315
00:42:57,183.4841129 --> 00:43:08,753.4841129
So when I'm doing cleansing, I am very particular about smoke cleansing that I do not use it unless it is a particular scent or herb.

316
00:43:09,543.4841129 --> 00:43:10,693.4841129
I do not sage.

317
00:43:11,523.4841129 --> 00:43:19,873.4841129
And that is because I am NOT an Indigenous person, using white sage is their sacred practices.

318
00:43:20,433.4841129 --> 00:43:24,228.3841129
People of this land use white sage, uh, for food.

319
00:43:24,668.4841129 --> 00:43:26,848.4841129
to not just to cleanse a space.

320
00:43:27,188.4841129 --> 00:43:29,358.4841129
They don't do it to just like get rid of ghosts.

321
00:43:30,218.4841129 --> 00:43:37,358.4831129
Um, they use it in a sacred ceremony and it has a lot more to do with calling in the spirits than it does getting rid of spirits.

322
00:43:37,968.4831129 --> 00:43:40,388.4841129
It is a great way to kind of cleanse negative energy.

323
00:43:40,768.4831129 --> 00:43:42,963.3841129
So smoke cleansing is something that's used in almost everything.

324
00:43:43,103.4841129 --> 00:43:49,253.4841129
Every culture across the globe, but I don't use the white sage and I don't sage, if that makes sense.

325
00:43:49,653.4841129 --> 00:44:06,743.4831129
So I do try to use herbs and bundles that I've made from pine, juniper, mullein, lavender, different types of herbs that are found locally or that might have been local to my own motherland in northern Europe.

326
00:44:06,823.4831129 --> 00:44:10,63.4841129
So, um, you Seining.

327
00:44:10,643.4841129 --> 00:44:14,773.4841129
That is kind of the Nordic practice of smoke cleansing.

328
00:44:14,903.4841129 --> 00:44:24,843.4841129
Um, but yeah, so, so much more rooted in a Celtic priestess tradition rather than, um, using sage.

329
00:44:25,433.4831129 --> 00:44:27,968.4841129
So, I will use smoke cleansing.

330
00:44:27,978.4841129 --> 00:44:28,868.4841129
I will use drumming.

331
00:44:28,878.4841129 --> 00:44:32,48.4841129
I will use chanting and I use a particular ritual that I do.

332
00:44:32,108.4841129 --> 00:44:33,278.4841129
Um, and I use Reiki.

333
00:44:33,378.4841129 --> 00:44:37,908.4841129
So I call upon the Reiki energy to cleanse and, and bless a home.

334
00:44:38,558.4841129 --> 00:44:41,838.4831129
Um, and it has been very effective when I've done this before.

335
00:44:41,868.4831129 --> 00:44:47,798.4841129
So I have a, I have a friend who's, um, invited me to come and do that at her home.

336
00:44:47,848.4841129 --> 00:44:55,183.4841129
And I'm very excited to To do that, I have done that a few times and I would love to do it for, um, real estate agents.

337
00:44:55,283.4841129 --> 00:44:58,593.4841129
If there are real estate agents that particularly want to get a home sold.

338
00:44:59,268.4841129 --> 00:45:13,138.4841129
Maybe it's having a difficult time getting sold because the previous owner's energy is still there or there is just an energy that makes people kind of lose their vibe when they come into the house.

339
00:45:13,768.4841129 --> 00:45:15,818.4841129
Um, and people can feel this.

340
00:45:15,998.4841129 --> 00:45:19,438.4831129
People know, people understand energy more than, than we think.

341
00:45:19,618.4831129 --> 00:45:24,248.4841129
Even very practical, logical people will come into a space and be like, it just doesn't feel right.

342
00:45:25,148.4841129 --> 00:45:28,338.4841129
So yes, I think that's a really great way.

343
00:45:28,608.4841129 --> 00:45:37,898.4841129
to um, to engage with your home when you first purchase a home is to kind of infuse it with your own essence.

344
00:45:38,598.4831129 --> 00:45:45,408.4831129
Um, as a witch, I practice the art of getting to know your home as a personality.

345
00:45:45,678.4841129 --> 00:45:54,438.4841129
Um, I think instead of maybe doing protection spells and warding spells, which are uh, which, which are.

346
00:45:55,538.4841129 --> 00:45:55,858.4841129
Yeah.

347
00:45:56,58.4841129 --> 00:45:58,628.4841129
So, which are great.

348
00:45:58,678.4841129 --> 00:46:06,918.4841129
Also, I think even more effective for me is to, um, treat my home like it's another person and it's another member of our family.

349
00:46:06,978.4841129 --> 00:46:13,668.4841129
And I teach my kids that she would like you to not do certain things.

350
00:46:14,88.4841129 --> 00:46:18,178.4841129
Um, bust your head through the drywall, please.

351
00:46:18,508.4841129 --> 00:46:19,398.4841129
I have little boys.

352
00:46:19,648.4841129 --> 00:46:20,498.4841129
If you have little boys.

353
00:46:22,393.4841129 --> 00:46:28,163.4841129
Um, you know, please be respectful of our home because she doesn't like that and she needs respect too.

354
00:46:28,223.4841129 --> 00:46:34,918.4841129
And she's, she Protects us and she, she gives us shelter and we love her.

355
00:46:35,938.4841129 --> 00:46:37,98.4841129
She keeps us warm.

356
00:46:37,158.4841129 --> 00:46:38,158.4841129
She keeps us cool.

357
00:46:38,198.4841129 --> 00:46:39,188.4841129
She's just amazing.

358
00:46:39,188.4841129 --> 00:46:39,628.4841129
My home.

359
00:46:40,298.4831129 --> 00:46:44,818.4841129
And so I think the more that you can engage personally with your space, the better.

360
00:46:45,238.4841129 --> 00:46:49,638.4836129
Um, I have also been invited and would love to, to do it someday.

361
00:46:49,638.4836129 --> 00:46:51,288.4841129
I've been to hair salons.

362
00:46:52,298.4841129 --> 00:46:56,773.4841129
Um, Women who go to hair salons, I think you understand this.

363
00:46:57,183.4841129 --> 00:46:59,303.4841129
The hair salon is kind of like a therapist's office.

364
00:46:59,863.4841129 --> 00:47:03,703.4841129
Sometimes you go in there with a bad energy and you leave your energy there.

365
00:47:04,343.4841129 --> 00:47:17,53.4841129
Uh, the problem with that is that all that energy can sometimes build up from all of the people coming in and getting their hair done and leaving their bleh, their bad juju energy in the salon.

366
00:47:17,503.4841129 --> 00:47:18,983.4841129
And it can start to get thick.

367
00:47:19,113.4841129 --> 00:47:20,693.4841129
It can start, you can start to feel it.

368
00:47:21,243.4841129 --> 00:47:22,593.4841129
So if you are a hairstylist.

369
00:47:23,748.4841129 --> 00:47:32,698.4831129
you work in a salon and you know what I'm talking about, you can always give me a call and I would be happy to come and cleanse that space for you.

370
00:47:34,28.4841129 --> 00:47:34,398.4841129
All right.

371
00:47:34,408.4841129 --> 00:47:36,128.4841129
So that's our question from a listener today.

372
00:47:36,128.4841129 --> 00:47:39,818.4831129
I'm so, so excited to get questions from listeners.

373
00:47:39,818.4841129 --> 00:47:52,188.4841129
If you are listening right now and you would like to try an emotional process that we've discussed today in our episode, um, I would love to give you a discount for listeners.

374
00:47:52,728.4831129 --> 00:47:54,248.4841129
So please reach out to me.

375
00:47:54,658.4841129 --> 00:48:01,268.4841129
And you can do that through my website, which is prism healing.

376
00:48:01,678.4841129 --> 00:48:02,268.4841129
com.

377
00:48:03,108.4841129 --> 00:48:06,88.4831129
Um, it will have my phone number there and you can text me.

378
00:48:06,298.4841129 --> 00:48:09,528.4841129
Uh, you can email me, you can contact me through the website.

379
00:48:09,798.4841129 --> 00:48:13,868.4841129
You can even send me a question if you have one for the podcast.

380
00:48:14,313.4841129 --> 00:48:16,13.4841129
I would love to hear from you.

381
00:48:16,73.4841129 --> 00:48:24,633.4841129
It just thrills me to no end when I have people just popping on my social media, my websites, and I go, Oh, yay, you're listening.

382
00:48:24,643.4841129 --> 00:48:25,303.4841129
That's so great.

383
00:48:25,313.4841129 --> 00:48:26,253.4841129
Thank you so much.

384
00:48:26,753.4841129 --> 00:48:28,3.4841129
Makes me feel so good.

385
00:48:29,263.4841129 --> 00:48:39,353.4841129
Next week, we will have Brenda Cridolfer on as a guest to do part two of this codependency and relationships topic.

386
00:48:39,443.4831129 --> 00:48:44,603.4841129
She is a relationship coach and she has her podcast, The Restored Wife.

387
00:48:45,163.4841129 --> 00:48:50,363.4841129
So I am excited to invite her on and we can discuss further some of these intimacy skills.

388
00:48:50,923.4841129 --> 00:48:52,993.4841129
I did her workshop a couple of months ago.

389
00:48:53,13.4841129 --> 00:48:55,593.4841129
It was fantastic and I can't wait to talk about it.

390
00:48:56,93.4841129 --> 00:48:57,323.4831129
I'll save that for next week.

391
00:48:58,58.4841129 --> 00:49:09,658.4841129
But I would like to invite you to follow me on Instagram at prism underscore healing, where I share a lot of really cool stuff that I'm doing.

392
00:49:09,668.4831129 --> 00:49:12,258.4841129
I share how to do spells.

393
00:49:12,298.4831129 --> 00:49:17,58.4841129
I'm going to be doing a segment on how to make a scrying mirror, different things like that.

394
00:49:17,378.4841129 --> 00:49:24,218.4841129
If you would like to, uh, Amp up your practice or learn a little bit more about this witchcraft stuff.

395
00:49:24,298.4841129 --> 00:49:30,68.4841129
Um, or you just simply want to see what I'm doing, what I'm up to, what I'm learning about.

396
00:49:30,258.4841129 --> 00:49:36,308.4841129
I love to share that on my Instagram, even more so than TikTok, but I am on TikTok as well.

397
00:49:36,368.4831129 --> 00:49:38,268.4841129
I am, um, at Prism Healing.

398
00:49:38,668.4841129 --> 00:49:39,388.4841129
on TikTok.

399
00:49:39,528.4841129 --> 00:49:52,838.4841129
I'm apparently in TikTok jail right now because my views are way low, so you'd be helping me out a ton if you followed me on TikTok and, um, viewed the content that I have been posting there because I work really hard on it.

400
00:49:53,148.4831129 --> 00:49:59,878.4841129
I feel like I do a pretty good job of making videos that are engaging and fun and interesting.

401
00:50:00,718.4841129 --> 00:50:04,558.4841129
Um, I also have my Tarot for Tips event.

402
00:50:04,938.4841129 --> 00:50:12,928.4841129
My Heart Smart Art Workshop for kids and my Healing Through Art, which is an emotional process in a group session.

403
00:50:14,278.4841129 --> 00:50:24,223.4841129
Fantastic way to experience the emotional processing in just a more gentle, um, Maybe just dip your toe in kind of way.

404
00:50:24,693.4841129 --> 00:50:27,383.4841129
And it's super fun to do as a date night or with your family.

405
00:50:27,893.4841129 --> 00:50:33,413.4841129
So sign up for one of my workshops, come and say, hi, say, I listened to your web.

406
00:50:33,733.4841129 --> 00:50:37,623.4841129
I've listened to your podcast and that's how I knew to come here today.

407
00:50:38,783.4831129 --> 00:50:44,413.4841129
Um, I would like to thank Ride the Wave Media, Just Blane for always supporting.

408
00:50:44,913.4841129 --> 00:50:51,343.4841129
This wonderful podcast and coming up with really fun projects that we are excited to be featuring very soon.

409
00:50:51,943.4841129 --> 00:50:54,723.4831129
Um, one of them is witch movies.

410
00:50:55,453.4841129 --> 00:50:55,953.4831129
Oh my gosh.

411
00:50:55,953.4841129 --> 00:50:56,633.4841129
I'm so excited.

412
00:50:57,173.4841129 --> 00:50:57,683.4836129
It's a secret.

413
00:50:57,683.4836129 --> 00:50:58,263.4841129
Don't tell anybody.

414
00:50:58,373.4841129 --> 00:50:58,703.4841129
Okay.

415
00:50:59,223.4831129 --> 00:51:05,23.4841129
Um, I would also like to thank Sarah at Daybreak Treasures Boutique for featuring me as an artist.

416
00:51:05,63.4841129 --> 00:51:10,93.4841129
You can go onto her website and see my and other Daybreak Local artists.

417
00:51:10,978.4841129 --> 00:51:12,458.4841129
featured on that website.

418
00:51:12,518.4841129 --> 00:51:15,678.4841129
Purchase artwork that are made locally in Daybreak.

419
00:51:15,748.4841129 --> 00:51:22,138.4841129
Please don't put artwork in your home that is just from home goods and is mass produced or whatever.

420
00:51:22,818.4841129 --> 00:51:24,778.4841129
Please buy local art.

421
00:51:24,858.4841129 --> 00:51:29,328.4841129
They, they're not that expensive and you're supporting an artist.

422
00:51:29,348.4831129 --> 00:51:31,168.4841129
So please support your local artists.

423
00:51:32,588.4841129 --> 00:51:40,343.4841129
All right, go Blane! Use Magick in your everyday life to strengthen relationships, heal, prosper, and thrive.

424
00:51:40,593.4841129 --> 00:51:42,713.4841129
We will see you here next week, witches and wizards.